Countdown Day 1 – Boks vs Australia

Five days to go until the so-called Springbok “B” team takes on the Whingeing Wallabies. We all wait in anticipation of the…

Attack of the killer Bs
 

The story so far…

Off to a good start
The Boks beat Australia in the opening game of the Tri Nations at Newlands by 22 points to 19 after some last minute dropkick heroics from Francois Steyn.
Match Review
Player Ratings

Back down to earth
After fading in the final ten minutes the Springboks go down 21-26 to the All Blacks in Durban.
Match Review
Player Ratings

The B’s are born
Jake White announces sweeping changes to the Bok squad to contest the away leg of the Tri Nations in Australasia. He effectively announces a Springbok B team:

Backs
Tonderai Chavhanga, Michael Claassens, Bolla Conradie, Bevin Fortuin, Peter Grant, Derick Hougaard, Wayne Julies, Waylon Murray, Wynand Olivier, Breyton Paulse, Ruan Pienaar, JP Pietersen, Jaco Pretorius

Forwards
Johan Ackermann, Eddie Andrews, Gary Botha, CJ van der Linde, Bismarck du Plessis, Jannie du Plessis, Hilton Lobberts, Johann Muller, Bob Skinstad, Albert van den Berg, Wikus van Heerden, Jacques Cronje, Cobus Visagie, Pedrie Wannenburg, Kabamba Floors

Bob Skinstad is appointed captain of the side.

The Wallabies start whingeing
The Australian administrators are spitting mad and start throwing big words like “betrayal” and “disgrace” around in reference to the second string Springbok side. True to form, they start whingeing about all the money they’re going to lose due to lack of public interest in the game. They want to cancel the fixture and play an extra game against New Zealand. Their idea is rubbished. The Kiwis jump on the bandwagon.

Jake ambushed at Sydney airport
The ARU spitefully leaks the details of the Boks’ arrival in Sydney and they are ambushed at the airport by rabid tabloid journalists (all the proper rugby writers are in Melbourne for the All Black clash). Jake puts them in their place by citing the hypocrisy in their arguments. Bob thanks the Aussie press for doing a brilliant job in motivating his players for the upcoming clash with the Wallabies.

Wallabies do the Boks a favour!
The Australians produce a superb performance against the all-conquering All Blacks and run out 20-15 victors. The result effectively keeps the Boks in with a sniff of winning the Tri Nations. “That is precisely what we needed. Now we have a chance again and there is a lot at stake,” said Bobby Skinstad.

And now, the tale continues…

After initial misgivings about the selected squad, a likely run-on fifteen doesn’t look half bad:

Springbok Killer B’s

01 CJ van der Linde
02 Gary Botha
03 Cobus Visagie
04 Johan Ackermann
05 Johann Muller
06 Wikus van Heerden
07 Pedrie Wannenburg
08 Bob Skinstad (capt)

09 Ruan Pienaar
10 Derick Hougaard
11 JP Pietersen
12 Wynand Olivier
13 Waylon Murray
14 Breyton Paulse
15 Bevin Fortuin

Surprise, surprise, the Wallabies have already started on the damage control, with Dan Vickerman saying that he disagreed with the media’s dismissal of the Boks’ chances:

“The Springbok team is a very proud rugby team. Any team they put on the park is always going to be a hard physical game. You know how the Springboks are going to play. All their teams are the same: physical, combative and they pride themselves in their set piece.”

Expect more of the same this week, as the Australians try to boost the Boks’ chances and have them firmly installed as favourites come the weekend. Some things never change!

Now the Kiwis have jumped on the ‘Slate the Boks Bandwagon’ with former All Black captain Sean Fitzpatrick, writing in the New Zealand Herald, saying he couldn’t understand Jake’s reasons for selecting a B side.

“In terms of developing leadership and combinations, withdrawing their top players now makes no sense. This is the time they need to turn into a battle-hardened unit and to expose themselves to as many different test-match scenarios as possible. You can’t do that sitting at home with your feet up.

“They say their top players are fatigued after a series of tough matches in the Super 14 and the opening two Tri Nations’ tests. So what? They’re not going to be fatigued when they get to the World Cup, which at the most is only seven matches long, and all the momentum they’ve built up over the past two months will now be lost.”

Oh Fitzy, your concern for the Springbok’s welfare is touching.

Former New Zealand prop Richard Loe also piped up on the issue.

“The match in Christchurch is only about two-thirds sold out and there is a lot of discontent. The South Island is only hosting one Test this year and a lot of supporters have booked travel and accommodation and bought tickets expecting to see a traditional clash between the All Blacks and South Africa. This year it should have been a particularly good game with the South African resurgence.”

“The withdrawal of the All Blacks from Super 14 was flagged almost six months before it happened so fans could buy in or opt out knowing what was on offer. The Boks, on the other hand, did not signal their intentions and fans committed to buying tickets believing they were going to be watching the best.”

Jake White kicked off proceedings this week by slating the Wallaby scrum.

“That is one area I really want to talk to the referee about. I thought (referee) Marius Jonker was outstanding the way he refereed the scrum (in the weekend’s match). The scrum for me was a non-issue, there wasn’t scrums, every scrum was a short arm or a penalty.

“That is something that concerns me. The Australians seem to be doing something very different from all the other teams. Their front row goes in first and they get a later delayed push from the five guys behind them, which I don’t quite think is the right way you should be scrummaging.

“The All Blacks at times got on top of the scrum. There was one time when McCaw picked up the ball at the side of the scrum going backwards and nearly scored. That was one of the times where it had a huge impact on the game, had he scored then the match would have been over, so as I said the scrum is very important to us and something we pride ourselves on it. We have got a big pack of forwards and I don’t want it to be stop start, all I want is a fair contest.”

The countdown continues tomorrow…

                

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6 thoughts on “Countdown Day 1 – Boks vs Australia

  1. A plane load of Saffa Dirtrack Boks, arrived Downunder to an almighty stink.
    Funnily enough – It wasn’t the written drivel that made the air go pink…
    It wasn’t the accusations and counter rucking, that caused all the ruckus
    But Jake and Bobby’s luggage was tampered with, said the Captain: “Boy’s, they’re trying to f**k us!”
    I’ve checked my belongings – don’t worry it’all all there…
    I got my boots, and a ball, and nice comb for my hair
    …..I know my looks ain’t fair!
    But neither is that scrum that awaits us… it’s bloody wrong.
    If the ref doesn’t do anything – well… We’ll make our own pong!”

    The Aussies didn’t rest at that, for they were up for a mass attack…
    Since Steve Irwin died… There’s been no news for any starving hack…
    The Ozzie Media, the ARU President, Prime Minister John Howard,
    On it went up thru the ranks – the whingeing became empowered…
    Til it got to the Queens door – she asked “What are they on about now?”
    After her aide explained the situ and the diplomatic tussle
    She sighed “I think it’s time We gave it back to them – We cannot stand the hassle!”
    The aide remarked: “Republic of Au Stralasia! Zippity Do!
    Or ‘RAUS’ for short – de dream, zen it vil be true!”

    Back in SA, Thabo was on the phone.
    A spy within the structure, heard him drone:
    “Oregon, when I said BEE(f) up the side, I did’t mean B Side the F’kers…
    And when I said – I wanted the process to be Whiter than White… I didn’t mean Jake…
    And when I said – I am an African…well…that was supposed to be offsides!
    What kind of an idiot do you me take for… besides…”
    He ranted and raved.. he thundered at Hoskins, he made an awful din…
    “I’ll tell you why it’s so bloody important this Word Cup win…
    If I can another World Cup bag – it’s worth an extra term… Listen Oregan you f*g
    Another term – that’s my fate!
    Now don’t make me pick up the phone – I don’t want to have to call Luyt!”

    Well now the week is upon us – and the only sound I hear
    Is the sounds of silence – as the Aussies squirm in fear…
    And all I want is for our Dirtrack squad to beat the men in yellow!
    And throw some light upon their sheepish bellow!

  2. I reckon the B side will fight well, but they will lose both games badly.

  3. Geez Boetiebum – that must take the prize for best comment of all time! Keeping you busy at work I see 😀 Good job son

  4. Ja – yesterday at work – I had no real graft.
    So I thought I’d talk in rhyme, but now they think I’m daft!

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